What do you tell your boss when you’re leaving your abuser?

by Evil HR Lady on April 8, 2013

Dear Evil HR Lady,

I will be leaving an abusive relationship very soon. My partner has communicated with me on my business email address and I expect when I leave he will bombard my company email address with emails. They may be threatening, he may send pornography. I don’t know.

I may also have to get an order of protection that would include my work address.

What are my obligations with regards to notifying HR about these potential issues? Do you know of any protections in place for me as a victim? I have an advocate with a local woman’s shelter but she wasn’t able to comment on my work situation except to advise me to confide in a manager I can trust, which I have.

I’m very frightened on every level and the thought of having potential problems at work because of this adds to my stress. Any input would be appreciated.

 To read the answer click here: What do you tell your boss when you’re leaving your abuser?

{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Another Evil HR Director April 9, 2013 at 2:15 am

Wonderful answer, Suzanne!

I wish the OP the best. I would add that most employers are going to be quite understanding and helpful. I’ve had several such situations over the years. We have always asked for the protective order info, a photo if possible (which gets posted for the receptionist to refer to) and other details so that we can alert the authorities if the subject of such an order comes onto the property. Employers really do want to keep everyone safe, the affected employee as well as all co-workers, and will normally do whatever is necessary to help accomplish this.

Reply

Anon April 9, 2013 at 4:59 am

I can’t add much to this really, but I’d also like to wish the OP the best.

Reply

Elizabeth West April 12, 2013 at 6:08 am

I too wish the OP the best. Leaving is the most dangerous time for her. I hope everything goes smoothly.

Reply

Jeff M April 12, 2013 at 8:01 am

Check out your local laws, both state and municipal. Seattle initiated “Sick/Safe Leave Act” this past September that specfically addresses protected leave in this situation. Also check your Health Insurance policy for any resources too.

Reply

Leave a Comment

Previous post:

Next post: