I got two emails in a row yesterday in which the employee texted obnoxious things to a manager and former manager. In the first scenario, the employee thought it was unfair that the manager was writing her up for insubordination because she texted on her private phone to his private phone when neither of them were at work. In the second case, the employee was fired for not showing up, but then heard the manager was telling lies about her so proceeded to text her repeatedly telling her how awful she was for lying. Surprisingly, this manager now gives out horrible references.
Look, life is sometimes unfair. Sometimes bosses are jerks, but they are still bosses. And if you don’t want to be written up, or given a bad reference you have to play nice.
For some reason, people think that texting is not like real communication. It is. And yes, it can be held against you. You shouldn’t be texting your boss after hours for anything that is not work related. You don’t need to “confront” your boss because you “heard” that she said something about you. If it is that concerning, this is something you discuss face to face, “Jane, I was told that you said I did x. I’m pretty sure that’s not the case, but I wanted to double check with you to make sure there’s no misunderstanding.” Sending a text that says, “Stop talking trash about me!” is not going over well.
Put down the phone. Walk away.